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hello everyone and welcome to my personal blog! :DDDD
i did some cooking the other day and took some pictures, but mostly this is to show Natsume about guacamole.
OK i made chorizo egg and potato tacos, guacamole, then later i cooked roasted vegetables; the rest of the potatoes (i had to use them up), carrots and onions with some random herbs (sage and thyme, had to use them up) and steaks and asparagus topped with bearnaise sauce (yes rilly).


picture is the ingredients for the guacamole. two avocados, an onion (it's a sweet yellow onion but u can use any kind), some plum (roma) tomatoes, a lime, and cilantro. u don't need that much cilantro but it's not like they sell less of it. i looked it up they call cilantro coriander in the uk. it's like parsley but a bit of a peppery flavor.


File: 1387045353072.jpg (2.04 MB, 4128x2322, 20131212_133047.jpg)

okie what u gotta do is cut open ur avocados, remove the pits (u can chop into the pit and twist it out with a knife after cutting the avocado in two) and mash up the inside with a fork. ur avocados should be kinda (but not too) soft, if they're hard they are not ripe yet. save the pits!
dice up ur tomatoes and remove the core/stem part and any goop and seeds from the inside (cut in half first before dicing them).
i don't like too much onion in mine so i only diced half an onion but u need that too [AND OMG onions make me cri everytime :((( they also make me sneeze when i chop them], and u want only the leaves from the cilantro (just run ur fingers up the stem the other way to peel them off, i don't care too much about a few little stem pieces), and dice up enough of that to fill maybe a couple table spoons.
i also cut the lime in half because u need lime juice, but not too much, so i only use half the lime.


File: 1387045387267.jpg (1.78 MB, 4128x2322, 20131212_134203.jpg)

when u squeeze ur lime juice put ur hand under it to catch any seeds that may jump out! i mixed in the onion half, and about half the tomatoes and saved the rest to top my tacos with. (:
i mixed in the cilantro, some salt and pepper to taste and just a tiny bit of extra virgin olive oil too. after mixing that all up i put the pits back into it because i think that helps it keep a bit longer (that is more than i'm willing to eat in one sitting. xD it doesn't keep very long tho).
it's really good on tacos, burritos, as a dip with chips (crisps for u yuropoors i guess) or whatever u might want to dip. picture is the completed guacamole, ready to eat! :D


File: 1387045469375.jpg (1.98 MB, 4128x2322, 20131212_134934.jpg)

next is the ingredients for the tacos!!
this is the mexican chorizo. spanish chorizo is a dry cured sausage but this is not cured it's raw. u cut open the casing and cook the contents in the pan. also u need eggs (i used 4 large eggs), potatoes (i used red potatoes but that is just what i had on hand, and i didn't bother peeling them because i like the skins on there) and corn (maize) tortillas and butter.


File: 1387045512188.jpeg (930.89 KB, 2064x1161, 20131212_135623.jpeg)

i barely greased the pan with a little olive oil before putting the sausage into it. it's really greasy so it doesn't need it but it might stick at first. for the tortillas, u want to melt a small amount of butter at a time, and cover both sides of ur tortilla with it. after it's cooked a bit, fold it in half and then flip it over as it starts to stiffen up. these will make ur taco shells but they will be more chewy than crispy like the commercial deep fried ones. i actually prefer them semi soft and it's more homemade style anyway. i think i did … 10 tortillas?? it was enough for the three links of sausage, two potatoes and four eggs. these were smaller tortillas so it would be different depending on the size. if u use the white flour kind i wouldn't pan fry them because they are more likely to stick; i'd just eat the tortilla as is in that case. either way is good though.


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keep stirring ur chorizo occasionally (so it doesn't stick!) until it cooks brown; maybe like 8 minutes. notice i have my 4 eggs beaten already and some tortillas pan fried while folded in half already. when the sausage is cooked, line a plate with paper towels (very important!!) and remove ur sausage, preferably with a slotted spoon. the reason u need the paper towels is this shit is greasy!! set it aside for now. there should be enough fat in the pan for ur potatoes, which u should have cut into ~1/2 inch chunks. again i didn't bother peeling them.


now maek pizza XD


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cook the potatoes in whatever fat is remaining in the pan until they are soft. make sure they don't stick by moving them occasionally.




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when the potatoes are cooked, return the chorizo to the pan, and turn the heat off and add the eggs, moving them with a spatula so they don't stick until they are completely cooked. i cook on cast iron and it holds heat very well, so if ur using something else like stainless u might just want to turn the heat on low until the eggs are cooked. mix everything together well, potatoes, sausage and eggs.

hmm.. maybe sometime. pizza from scratch might be tricky. i've only ever done the premade frozen kind.


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i went ahead and ate 3 of them (i was cooking for more ppl tho, obviously), but this was my plate. i filled the fried tortillas with the sausage/egg/potato mix and topped with guacamole and sour cream (the full fat kind not that wimpy reduced fat shit… and lel i used to buy heavy cream and add a little buttermilk for the right enzymes or w/e it has and leave it out for a day until it thickens to make my own creme fraiche xD… but that is another thing entirely)
the sliced lime is just for fun i guess, i just cut up the rest of the lime.
pls tell me anyone if u'd eat this DDD:


File: 1387045870148.jpg (1.3 MB, 4128x2322, 20131212_144359.jpg)

next up is… bearnaise sauce! this is actually kinda tricky to make. it's an emulsified sauce. u know how they say oil and water don't mix?? well sometimes they do, and that's an emulsion. there are so many little details u have to get right or it won't combine, but once u learn how to do it, i guess it's like riding a bike. i broke my first 3 attempts at hollandaise but never have after that, and i've made these sauces many times now. since they are tasty. it's basically a mix of egg yolks, a wine/vinegar reduction, and butter, flavored with tarragon. OHH EMMM GEEE IT'S SOOO GOOD. this one differs from hollandaise because it does not use lemon juice and it adds tarragon. normally when i make hollandaise i just use a white wine vinegar and don't bother making a reduction with shallots and white wine but just use a mix of vinegar and lemon juice but this time i went all out and did a reduction of white wine vinegar and white wine with shallots and pepper and tarragon and i maybe didn't reduce it just enough but i was afraid to burn the vinegar because i did that once and OMG it stunk to high hell. do not ever burn vinegar.


anyway the ingredients to this stuff are butter, white wine vinegar (about 1/4 cup), white wine (i got a random argentian sauvignon blanc that was in the bargain bin at the liquor store, it needs about 1/3 cup) 4 egg yolks, tarragon, salt (i fill that little box with salt so i can sprinkle it), shallots (i cut up 4 but that was probably too many), pepper (that's my pepper grinder next to the salt. it's got black pepper in it and the thing said to use white peppercorns but omg i don't care enough about the color of the sauce for that. and also it calls for cayenne pepper but i didn't have any and didn't feel like buying that so i subbed in paprika (since they are both red pepper kinda powders, yes i know that cayenne is much hotter but these sauces are not supposed to be hot anyway and u just use a pinch of it.


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i had a bunch of veggies that i needed to cook before they went bad, mostly these potatoes but i had a few onions and some baby carrots too. i chopped everything up fairly roughly and seasoned it with some herbs (sage and thyme) that i needed to use and salt and pepper. i tossed all of that with some olive oil in a dutch oven (and oh, the oven has been preheated for a bit now at 475F), and after it started to sizzle i added some chicken stock, not following any recipe it's just what i had on hand, and threw it in the oven, covered, for about 30 minutes.


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back to that sauce though… here i have all of the burners on the stove turned on. that is how u know i'm doing some serious cooking; ALL OF FOUR BURNERS AT ONCE. from the top left we have a pan with a half lb of butter sliced up and melting, bottom left is just water in a sauce pan being brought up to a boil. it will form the bottom part of my double boiler. top righ the large stock pot has water and asparagus in it (with a little salt, and yes, i left it too long and it got a bit softer than i prefer but oh well). on the asparagus i just snapped the ends so they wouldn't be tough. i didn't peel them to be fancy because i was too busy with other stuff to care about that. bottom right saucepan? that is the vinegar/wine/shallots and tarragon for the bearnaise.
as for the dishes on the stove? the measuring cup is going to hold the butter once it's melted and the glass bowl will become the top part of my double boiler (normally u see stainless steel used but this is thick glass and i'm not worried about it cracking, it's just being exposed to the steam anyway, not direct heat, if anyone is going to criticize that. also here: http://forkableblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/double-boiler.jpg i'm not the only one who's used glass so it's safe.)


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here is the saucepan on the right in close up. it's the shallots, tarragon, wine, and wine vinegar all boiling together. i should have saved some of the tarragon to add to the sauce after straining it but oh well.


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the coffee mug contains egg whites, the bowl now has four egg yolks. yes, i broke one, eat me. u separate the white from the yolk just by passing it back and forth between the two halves of the shell until only the yolk remains. if u clumsily stab the yolk with the edge of the shell u can break it so don't do that. only a tiny amount of egg white got into the yolks so it's fine tho. notice that the vinegar/wine/shallots/tarragon is now boiling also. u need to reduce that down to i think about 1/4 cup.


File: 1387046194561.jpg (2.13 MB, 4128x2322, 20131212_155235.jpg)

after the wine/vinegar mixture has reduced enough (ideally u should have about half the amount of melted butter as the mix of the yolks and vinegar reduction) u should strain it and mix it into the egg yolks, whisking to combine them very well. the eggs will have a lot of bubbles because they're watery. that's normal at this point. just whisk until it combines well. also notice that on the left the butter has melted. u turn the heat off when it has u don't want to burn the butter. just let the foam float to the top. u can skim it off to clarify it or not. i normally take most of the solids off the top but not all of them. if u leave them in the final sauce will be thinner. i like it thicker more like mayonnaise so i usually remove most of that.


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i poured the butter into the pyrex measuring cup after skimming most of the solids off. as u can see there are still some, i poured the rest of the butter solids over the roasted veggies which i just took out of the oven (they are done now, i think they were in there for ~30 minutes) and so that is the bit of white stuff u see on top of them. oh those egg whites i cooked in the butter remaining in the small pan and fed it to the cats outside.


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at this point the water in the saucepan on the left is boiling so i put my bowl with the eggs and vinegar reduction mix over it. and start whisking. this is the trickiest part. u have to cook the eggs just enough so it can combine with the butter. if u cook them too much the eggs will scramble and ur sauce breaks. if the butter is still too hot it can overcook the eggs itself and break the sauce. if the eggs are undercooked they will be too watery and the sauce will break. if u put the butter in too quickly the sauce will break. once u get the hang of how to do this tho it's pretty easy, u just have to pay attention.


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steam will build up under it and also u don't want ur eggs to get too hot so i remove the bowl occasionally to let out the steam and keep it the right temperature. u just have to see how it is reacting.


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and then put it back on to let it cook more, still whisking. this will make ur arm tired.


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what u are looking for it when the eggs start to get a thicker, ropey texture when the whisk is lifted and for the bubbles to disappear. now it is cooked. some things say to turn down the heat but i just take the bowl off the boiling pot but leave the heat on with the bowl next to it at this point, since it won't break when u mix in the butter as long as u keep it hot. it's worse if u let it get too hot and over cook the eggs though. (ur sauce will break if u do that)


File: 1387046589760.jpg (2.77 MB, 4128x2322, 20131212_161016.jpg)

this is very tedious and tiring but what u have to do is pour a little bit of butter into the bowl and whisk it until it combines completely, a few drops at a time. picture is the completed sauce, ready to eat. i tried to mix in some of the tarragon from the reduction again, i don't mind that i got a few pieces of shallot in there. i added some salt, pepper and a pinch of paprika (yea i know u'r supposed to use cayenne, w/e) to season to taste.
do i have to tell u this sauce is delicious?? it is great on steak but also good on any veggies. i put it on my steak and asparagus.


File: 1387046643868.jpg (2.36 MB, 4128x2322, 20131212_161454.jpg)

i took some of the shallots and vinegar remaining and did a half assed vinaigrette (that had too many shallots) just as a dressing for my salad. i only made a little bit because nobody else likes salad. plebes. it's not very pretty but it's just olive oil and vinegar whisked together. u start with the vinegar and drip in a little oil at a time, just like mixing the butter on the previous sauce until it thickens up. it's also an emulsion but i don't care too much about keeping it together. hey it's not pretty but it's just for me to eat so i didn't put much effort into it.


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here are the steaks i cooked. there are two tenderloin steaks (one is mine) and the big one is a T bone for the picky eater who wants it cooked medium well. FTW who doesn't eat steak rare? i put salt and pepper all over the steaks and then rub them with olive oil. then i heated up the pan until smoking hot (with no oil in the pan) and put the steaks in. i cooked mine 2 minutes per side and then took it out. the t bone went into the oven a bit to cook dramather because of picky eater.


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here is the complete meal for me. on the right is my salad with the kinda sloppy vinaigrette i made. on the left is the steak, (at the top, buried in sauce) the asparagus, (also buried in sauce) and the roast veggies. the wine is the same the sauce was made with, if anyone is going to bitch about white wine with red meat pls shut up. would anyone else eat this??? it tasted good. other people liked it but i don't feel like they appreciate what i do for them really. give upboat pls if u like but also if u don't like it please tell me how disgusting this all is and give me ur worst abusive comments. k thx bye.


and since that was a bunch of posts, here are the ones with complete food:

the guacamole
le sauce bearnaise
steak, asparagus, veggies and salad with bearnaise and a vinaigrette.

tell me if u'd actually eat any of this.


the only thing i eat is the bussy


nice dubs!
what is bussy? pussy? i didn't cook any cats o_O


File: 1387053998411.png (274.89 KB, 600x937, 00d76642e08dc9fcb0b8a02f9de3e4…)

Look good lelo. I'd eat it. Jeez, that's a classy meal.


thank u so much and u ought to try making ur own guacamole sometime :DDD


the mexican betty crocker


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hmm its gud butt(n_n) not great
jk looks like my mom made this 10/10 would clean up after


bumping a thread


i bumped urmom last noght if u know what i mene

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